I always envisioned that my morning routine in my 30’s would include waking up to the smell of coffee, putting on my fashionable navy pencil skirt with the white button down shirt, throwing in some color with the red heels, saying good morning to the doorman, heading to work with the crowds in the beautiful New York City, walking confidently into work, commanding a room with my demeanor, and running corporate America. Throughout high school and college, I would sit on my porch swing surrounded by cornfields in my parents Indiana farmhouse, dreaming of what I could accomplish in my life. God has always equipped me with an intensity for accomplishing things, that can be both a blessing and a burden.
Now, for the real life story, I don’t get up to an alarm clock, but to children crying or yelling my name. Getting dressed in the morning is based primarily on what is on the top of the clean clothes stack and usually consists of yoga pants (that have yet to see a yoga class). The pop of color is the white baby spit-up on the black shirt I just put on. I have no doorman; that would be so nice. Instead I make my way to the minivan holding the two-year olds hand, the infant car seat, diaper bag, purse, teenage daughters lunch, and hopefully somewhere in there I have the keys to the car. I may not command a room, but my two-year old has the amazing ability to get everybody’s attention when his “desires” aren’t met. Daily life seems to be pure chaos for our family of 5. However, I am in love with my life, my husband, my kids, my work, my chaos.
My life has turned out different than I imagined it would; however, it doesn’t mean that what God has instilled in me has dramatically changed. I am still that same ambitious dreamer I have always been. My desire to accomplish much with my life is a daily craving and a constant topic between God and I. God is continually grooming my thoughts within this arena. Below are some items He is currently discussing with me.
Shush-up and Play Your Harp
I tend to be an “eager beaver” in trying to seek out what God has for me next. My thoughts of the future are like brain candy to me! However, God is constantly reminding me that the moment has purpose. I am reminded of David. At the age of 15 he was sought out by the prophet Solomon and anointed as king for a future time. Solomon left, and David returned to the pasture to tend to the sheep, until the day he was called to the palace. I’m sure there was so much built up excitement for David in that moment, only to find out that he was there to only play his harp. For seven years David sat in the presence of King Saul playing his harp knowing he was anointed to be king. I believe God was using those years to train David, a shepherd, on how to (or how not to) be king. God has been teaching me that in the years where I may feel stagnant in where God is taking me, to shush-up and play my harp. I’m in training, and need to soak up every moment with God as a teachable moment as he prepares me for the next journey we will go on together.
Think Play-Doh Not Building Blocks
I am such a strong believer that each of us has such a unique set of gifts and strengths to offer the world around us! The scriptures are clear in Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12 that we are all equipped in different ways. God has taught me that the gifts he has given me aren’t to be put on the shelf just because I may not be placed in the perfect situation to use them, but to be creative to find everyday moments where I can use those gifts! We need to treat our gifts from God like play-doh that we can mold into our everyday life, instead of square blocks that only fit in the square hole. For instance, I know one of my gifts is being an achiever. I have to accomplish things each day to feel fulfilled. However, when my day consists of working from home, diapers, bottles, potty training, car-pooling, dinner, going into the office, emails… I can feel like nothing truly was accomplished that day, just maintained. I have to purposefully go to God at the end of the day to discuss what was accomplished that day. Where did growth happen? What conversations did I have with my teenager to grow her spiritually? To make sure that I am using my gifts, I may have to put an emphasis on the small items that can make a big return.
Pastor Ron often says that the grass isn’t greener on the other side; instead it’s greener on the side where it gets watered. I could sit and dream about a different life, but instead I choose to invest in the beautiful life that God has graciously given me. Whatever stage you are in, remember that there are always seasons that God uses as training grounds for what is to come and to never use your circumstances as an excuse to not use the precious gifts God has instilled in you! You are beautifully made with a plan of purpose and intention!